My Boo is a Comedian-- Vol IV.

So, Donny is selling his Blazer.  And this is his craigslist ad...  Enjoy.  (Oh, and in case you're wondering, it's in all caps because that means he's serious...)

BRAND NEW-ish CHEVROLET BLAZER

and

THE BEST YEAR THEY MADE THEM!!

IT ONLY HAS 212,911 MILES... BARELY BROKEN IN!!

IT COMES WITH ALL OF THE BELOW OPTIONS:

STEERING WHEEL
TIRES (IN DECENT SHAPE)
WHEELS
ENGINE (4.3 liter AND RUNS!!)
TRANSMISSION (a year old)
SEATS (FRONT AND BACK!!!)
DOORS (ALL FOUR!!)
WINDOWS (THEY'RE ALL ELECTRIC & FUNCTIONING!!)
DOOR LOCKS (THREE EVEN WORK WITH THE INCLUDED REMOTE!!)
HORN
CHECK ENGINE LIGHT (TO VERIFY THAT THERE IS AN ENGINE)
WINDSHIELD WIPERS
LIGHTS (THAT EVEN EXUDE REAL LIGHT)
HOLE WHERE THE RADIO WAS (YOU WON'T NEED IT WHILE DRIVING AROUND YELLING OUT THE WINDOW ABOUT HOW AWESOME YOUR BRAND NEW-ish BLAZER IS)
HOOD (EVEN CLOSES PROPERLY!!!!)
TOWING PACKAGE (INCLUDING WIRING)
CUP HOLDERS (TO HOLD ALL OF YOUR NON-ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES) 
KEYS (THREE TO BE LYING, ACTUALLY ONLY TWO)

BUT WAIT!!!!!

I'LL EVEN THROW IN A LAWN CHAIR BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING TO NEED SOMEWHERE TO SIT WHILE STARING AT YOUR AWESOME NEW BLAZER!!

PLEASE RESPOND TO THIS VIA EMAIL AND IF I FEEL THAT YOU CAN HANDLE THE RESPONSIBILITY OF THIS GRAND MACHINE, I WILL RESPOND TO YOU!!

THANKS FOR LOOKING, 

DONNY

For further enjoyment, previous episodes of "My Boo is a Comedian" are available here, here, and here.